It must be Duende,
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Power of Duende
It must be Duende,
The fake needles scratch
the skin as you put the tree up.
The glitter ornaments shimmer
as you turn on the colored lights
for the first time this december.
Ornaments of different shapes and
sizes drape from the branches.
Presents start to stack under the
tree, different types of wrapping,
tags with many different names.
There's excitement and laughter as
you watch family open their gifts.
Ham with mashed potatoes, corn
and pumpkin pie fill the dinner
table, family talks while you eat,
When over and more time has
passed it's time to put t he past behind.
You pack up the ornaments, the
tinsel, the lights, and as the needles
scratch the skin one more time there
is a feeling of sadness.
For christmas time is gone,
But it will will come again next year.
All I Want To Do
Hello happiness, I've left you so far behind.
My mind is filled with need and wants and
I can't focus anymore.
Why does this world have to be money oriented.
Nothing can be done without it,
People are living on the streets because
They don't have it.
Why can't we pay with kindness and emotions?
I Can Feel You
Tonight I can feel your presence,
Almost like you never left and your
Still standing close, watching my every move.
I hear your whisper and I'm scared
Because I know it's not real and
I'll loose you once again.
But tonight, I'll keep you here,
I can feel your presence.
My mind fills with blankness.
I'm blind to see all i knew before.
The words and the definitions I memorized.
This test time will be worthless without that.
Information somewhere in my mind,
The mind which is blank and full of nothing.
Soft whispers fill a classroom,
something is coming,
the smell of corndogs cooking in the cafeteria,
the sound of the band playing down the hall.
A bang outside the room,
Mr. Feller looks out the glass of the door,
the hall is empty,
‘What’s that’ asked by a high pitched voice.
Something sweet fills the room,
it becomes cloudy and we cannot
- see what’ going on anymore
it’s like blindness all around.
We’re all down on the floor crawling,
‘what do we do’ someone asked,
no answer from Mr.Feller-
fear fills the room from the students.
A few minutes pass.
Mr.Feller clears his throat,
the room clears, all faces are seen again,
No voices are heard,
except Mr. Fellers soft whisper ‘what was that?’
Violins start us out, slow and sweet.
The vibrato gives chills to its listener.
The horns join in with a sweet melody,
They play together in harmony.
We catch an oboe in a solo,
The flutes and clarinets join in.
Suddenly we’re unaware of what’s going on
Around us, we’re sucked in.
A voice starts singing and it’s beautiful,
Charming and it takes us on a journey
Through a song we’ll want to stay with,
And never want that moment to end.
Tattoos are cool one day and
then they’re out the next. Seems
like everyone has one these days.
Piercings are in one day and
then they’re not the next, Seems like
everyone is getting their nose pierced these days.
Bellbottoms were cool in the 70’s
and then they went out of style.
Now it seems everyone’s got a pair.
Fads are in, then out, then back
again. What new fads will wee see next?
Beads, there are so many.
They make earrings and
Bracelets and necklaces
And sometimes even rings.
People use thread and
Wire and different metals
To make jewelry that
beads are used for.
But what else can beads do?
Spill all over, get lost in the carpet,
become a pain in the butt when
you can’t find them. But beads
will be beads, and they’re
sometimes nice to look at.
Help Me Teach
Help me teach her how to read
to teach her how to walk.
Help me teach him how to swim,
to teach him how to talk.
Help me teach them how to eat,
to use forks and spoons and such.
Help me teach them what they’ll
need to know, so when they’re
grown up and gone, they’ll be
taught all they’ll need, to live.
The leaves are gone,
The air begins to chill,
Suddenly I miss the warm days of summer.
I know snow will be falling soon
And I’ll be looking back on those
Days bathing in the sun on the beach.
Snow is pretty and it
Glimmers in the sun as it falls
But then I have to wear
A winter coat to keep me warm.
I don’t mind my winter coat.
But after Christmas has passed
I’ll be looking at the falling snow
out my window,
Wishing for those warm days once more.
Round and Round We Go
You’re stupid, you’re smart.
You silly ho, how could you do this?
I love you, I hate you.
Don’t leave me! Please stay!
Hands intertwined while lying together.
Yelling and Screaming.
Kisses and fondling.
Things thrown in anger.
Watered flowers, chocolate candies.
Misunderstandings and wrong things said aloud.
Pictures and Cards hung on the walls.
Laughter and tears.
The beginning, the end.
And then it starts, again.
Cold and white.
I can’t feel my fingers,
I can see my breath in the air.
I can’t feel my hands,
my nose is stuffed and I keep sniffling.
I can’t feel my arms,
My nose is red and wet from my breath.
I can’t feel my toes,
I’m moving my legs around frantically.
I can’t feel my legs,
I breathe quietly in the white darkness.
I’m numb. I’m numb.
All is black.
Blood Red covered her finger nails.
They were as long as a nail you’d
use with a hammer, dangerous.
The way she walked around you thought
She’d killed someone.
Maybe she had.
She didn’t say much, she was one of those.
Just sat on the couch in isolation.
In her own little ward,
not paying attention to the world around her.
Redness fill my cheeks as I get embarrassed.
Odd elevator music plays as I ride to the 9th floor.
Yellow teeth pass me on the street.
Grapes fill the fruit bowl in the kitchen.
Beethoven plays on a record in the other room.
Interesting quotes fill the newspaper.
Vintage skirts fill shop windows, once again.
Smiles, they’re everywhere.
Especially in Minnesota when
your walking down the street
and you see someone, they smile.
What’s up with that?
Then there’s the clerk at the grocery
store, and the lady at Walgreens
who seems to happy to be there.
And the guy at Perkins who greets you.
For once I’d like to see someone not
smiling while greeting at Walmart,
or the drive thru guy at McDonald’s
not to say ‘Have a nice day’.
Something different, something new.
But for now I smile back at all of them,
In my own world, sometimes because
I want to, but sometimes because I have to.
Heaven In A Hot Shower
Hot heaven cascades down your back,
the water causing dew on the mirror.
You don’t want to get out
because you know
it’s cold outside the shower.
It’s 10 pm and it’s been a long day.
It’s time to relax.
The soap on your loofah suds up,
You smell the aroma of your bodywash.
Shampoo soaks your hair clean,
getting out the dirt of the day.
After the shower a new adventure.
A new beginning.
We called him Jean Claud.
He sat on the table near our window.
His green leaves with yellow spots
stared at us while we ate
and watched television.
We watered him, we loved him.
He still sits on our table
by the window. I’m used
to him there now. What would
I do if he just withered away.
Mmmmmm probably just buy a new one!
Howdy Cowboy Tom yells upstairs.
Want to ride with me Tom moves through the house.
A fake horse and galloping.
Feet make noises on the wood floor.
I get out of bed.
It’s a new day.
Darkness, comfortable seats,
Popcorn and candy, a coke with ice,
big widescreen in front of us,
millions of pictures before our eyes,
People around us switch their crossed legs.
The salty taste of our buttered
Popcorn fills my mouth, I’m
feeling satisfied on our
decision to have this night out.
No where else I’d rather be
than here in the darkness.
Ask me why I cried when you first
Said you loved me,
Ask me why after six years we’re
still not married,
Ask me why I hate when your
mom texts me,
Or why after we watch a movie
I crave popcorn.
Ask me why I’ve stayed after all
Why I’m still here and not gone.
Ask me why I want you to ask me,
Ask me why.
The smell of pinesol fills the air
as the mop water splashes onto the floor. I relax as
The green scrubby sponge clears the crumbs
from the counters, removing the
Pink stain that was there for six
days straight, some jelly or juice
that one of my stupid roommates spilled.
I watch dust go into the air as the
sun shines in, the vacuum loud
and barely picking anything up.
I pick hairballs off the carpet
that have been left by any of the
four girls that live in the apartment.
I throw them into the already full
garbage. Great, another thing to do.
But once done all will be well,
and I can once more relax and
enjoy the cleanliness of my apartment.
I can still remember that day-
When I kissed her cold cheek
I was more scared than words can say,
Shaking, I felt myself getting weak.
This was my last chance to say goodbye
They pushed me near her bed
As I kissed her I tried not to cry,
I couldn't believe she was dead.
To this day the smell of old furniture
And spice reminds me of her,
Watching Wheel of fortune together, her nature-
I won't forget the fun we had together.
I loved her and I still do.
Grandma, I'll never forget you.
Time For Me
When will it be my time,
to tell them my story?
When will they see my rhyme,
makes sense to my gore.
How can they judge me now, here on the street,
They make assumptions about my life.
I wish they could just read my mind,
Explanations are easier that way, sometimes
words just don’t come out right.
I could write them my response
can they read my writing?
Call me crazy, but I know
they just won’t get it now.
Who killed this body,
The gun shot through the leg,
Broken shoulder and ribs, blood on
The cold face, who killed me?
A Day In The Life
The garbage truck outside woke me at 5am.
I’ve been up since then,
lying here waiting for sleep to take
me back but I stay awake,
Work at 7am so I get dressed.
I put my wheat toast in the
Toaster. I push the toast down,
nothing happens. It’s
I go to work hungry I try
to stay awake while my boss
lectures me about posted notes.
Who cares, I say to myself,
He’s so boring.
I come home from work at
4pm. Nate greets me with a lick
on the hand. I missed you too boy.
The day is almost done and I’m
I get into bed and move the covers
up over my hands. So warm and
quiet. My eyes start to close
and I can feel myself being pulled into
Robber (Yet Again)
Freedom wasn’t busy that night.
She walked right in and right out.
She was two thousand dollars richer.
Hand it over.
Fresh wod of cash, two.
I love the smell of money.
Clerk calls 911, but what can they do
Freedom doesn’t have a camera.
She gets away.
She’s a smart woman, but
She doesn’t know that it’s going to
Catch up to her.
He turned and looked behind him.
He didn’t know why but he felt that
he wasn’t alone.
He walks along the curb of
5th street and turns to open his car door.
He was alone, but he didn’t feel alone.
He starts his car and puts his
foot on the gas. What would
cause the car not to want
to move? He gets out.
In front of his tires there were
He removes the bricks and gets back
in the car. He is alone, but
he doesn’t feel alone.
He drives home and turns the
car off. He waits. He didn’t feel
He moves quickly to his front
door. what now?
His mind is freaking out as he puts
the key in to unlock the door,
He feels a hand, he turns,
The black pen scratches words onto the empty paper. The page fills up with things you don’t understand, but you wish you could.
You’re tired and you want to give up, but your stuck. You have to finish it before you can turn it in, before it’s due.
How long will it take until you finish the task? Why must it be so time
consuming? Why must it take up so much of our social time?
The answer is unknown, but so clear. You’ll know someday.
[Last of her]
Look at her body
Lying in the grass by that old oak tree
She never had a chance
to see the world
lucky to be alive while she was
She knew a man
He knew her in ways no one else did
she wore her heart on her sleeve
when she was around him
but now she’s silent [nothing left].
I wish I could have known; I could have
saved her; If only she could have known.
One Endless Sky
The rain falls from the endless sky of blue,
Rain freezes and becomes cold white snow,
Flakes fall from high above and stick like glue,
In daylight you can see its shiny glow.
The stars are twinkling in the dark night sky,
The massive moon dappled on the ground,
Sunrise lights the day and makes you cry,
The sun filled with beauty; one big mound,
Fluffy clouds fill the blue open space,
Wind moves leaves on the ground below,
Looks like rain is going to ruin this perfect place
The quiet nothingness gone; no longer mellow,
The sky is now filled with an endless pink,
Staring at it really makes one think.
She let me go right off the edge,
The wind blew sand right through my hair,
As if she pushed me off the ledge,
She left me with an evil stare.
Winter Follows Fall
Wet drops fall from the sky
Landing on branches, and hitting
Sideways on the glass window upstairs.
I can hear the drip drip of the water
Falling from the gutters, leaves
Rustling in the yard, in the wind.
What will happen once the leaves
Have all fallen, the ground covered
In maroons and golds of fall.
Fallen branches and white specks
Falling from the cold air, the start
Of a new season, the start of winter coats
And heavy boots, the start of Winter.
The Professor in the Fall
The rake scrapes the cement and scoops
up the red and yellow leaves,
with a clank on the ground.
Wool pants seem like the perfect choice
because it’s windy, but when you go inside
the school building, you feel
the sweat bead on your skin.
The irritating black gnats that land
on your shirt while walking outside,
you hit your shirt, leaving a black smear.
Withered grapes in the dry fields,
that make for no good taste
in an alchoholic wine.
You turn the television on
And slump down onto the couch
--the new nothingness of fall.
I Don't Know
I don't know how i should ask,
Or what i should act like,
Or where it should be.
I don't know how you'll be feeling,
Or if you'll be ready,
Or if you'll need time.
I don'r know if love is enough,
If this will last,
Or if it's meant to be.
I don't know if i should ask,
Maybe I won't, Maybe I will.
I don't know.
Winter Has Begun
The first snowfall comes down upon the cold ground:
white flakes hitting the ground and making a thin white layer on the concrete.
Think of the smell of winter, the cinnamon in the hot apple cider,
the mittens on children running around building snowmen.
Imagine the sleigh rides you can take at the winter carnival,
the ice sculptures perfect and frozen as you walk by enjoying the art of them.
Even the rosy pink cheeks of people walking by gives you a smile on your face,
their heads poking out of their puffy coats and thick winter hats.
The cars stuck in the mounds of snow that cover them after a storm,
the tire tracks left in the parking lots after snow has fallen,
the sound that the snow makes as it crinkles under your boot
when your walking, the feeling of the flakes as they fall on your face
as you look at the sky, white clouds, frozen water, falling
right before your eyes.
The sun shines
on the light color purple
as the lilacs move with the wind.
What does it mean to be a lilac?
to be recognized by your color,
the vast purple, and the smell,
so familiar and yet so
beautiful and sweet.
To live peacefully,
only to be gawked at, taken away,
to grow and die, to come back
when the weather is nice,
to sleep away the winters.
The smell of sweetness,
flash our pretty purple color
to the Bees,
and then to disappear.